Get Back Your Ex Now!

Filed Under Society |

by Erik J. Michaels

Breakups hurt, everyone knows that. That’s the price you pay for the dumb things you do to get yourself dumped…but sometimes everything doesn’t have to end this way. Get up off your butt and kick yourself into gear, you can get your ex back if you just put in some effort!

Your first step to getting your ex back needs to be changing your mind, and your outlook on life. We generally change our minds about 30 times a day anyways, so put that skill to use. If you take the wrong perceptual approach to a breakup, you’re just going to sink into depression and gain nothing from the pain. If you look at it the right way, however, you can forge that raw feeling into something that really helps you turn things around: motivation.

Don’t keep looking at things like they “happened to you.” This is called passive self-victimization. Okay, so I made that up, but it’s a good name for what you’re doing to yourself if you see your ex as the “bad guy” or beat yourself up continuously over the things that caused you to lose out on your relationship. Take responsibility for the things you did that resulted badly, but don’t let yourself think that there’s nothing you can do.

Nothing can fuel a change like something bad that needs to be made good. Destitute peasants have led revolutions to overthrow the most powerful people of their countries for that reason…I’m pretty sure you can find the self-empowerment from this experience to kick yourself into high gear and really get motivated to change your own situation. Use your hurt and anger and convert it into determination to solve your problems.

Take a frown and turn it upside down. Take this separation as a lesson to be learned (or in some cases quite a few lessons). Congratulations, you are officially an expert on what DOESN’T work for keeping a relationship from going south. Use that knowledge. Analyze your relationship, and figure out just what it was that ended up torpedoing the bond between you and your ex.

When you’ve come up with a list of about 20-50 things you could improve on (I’m sure your ex could find that many), it’s time to get busy correcting your problems. I can’t help you solve every single problem, only you can do this…all I can say is that you need to dedicate yourself to this, and really work to make things work. If you try to go back to your ex as the same person who got dumped, you’re just going to have your heart broken again, and probably mess up any chances you may have had.

Once the main issues have been settled or at least are on their way to being settled, the next step is to break back into contact with your ex. You might even still be in contact, but chances are you haven’t talked to each other in a while, so usually a good “ice rebreaker” is a short phone call or email seeing how he/she is doing. Remember to keep things light for a while, and just work up slowly from whatever point you get to. Rushing things is the best way to mess them up, so pace things with how your ex is feeling.

Your ex is most likely still in love with you. Cruel, heartless, “drop you flat” breakups don’t happen as much in real life as they do in the movies…it’s usually a wedge driven between two people who do still love each other. Just make sure you don’t wait too long to pull yourself together…people do move on, and if that’s the case all your efforts are going to do is cause more pain. Remember to give your ex all the space he/she needs, but if you just sit back and cry you’ll miss your window of opportunity. If you have the right timing, however…you can get your ex back. It just takes some pushing yourself.

About the Author:

This article come just a tiny bit too late to stop a breakup? Get instant relief from breakup agony and a proven-effective process to get your ex back. Free articles and info at http://www.getyourexbacknow.com/just_break_up.html. Click here for other unique ‘dating’ articles.